• Establish household rules and routines where you tell and remind your children that it is not normal or okay for them to bully, to be bullied, or to stand by while others are being bullied.
• Discourage teasing and bullying among family members, both adult-to-child and child-to-child.
• Coach your child NOT to tease, push, or hit.
• Teach your child skills for good peer relationships:
  • Showing kindness to others
  • Avoiding mean behavior
  • Playing fairly
  • Taking turns
  • Respecting others
  • Sharing feelings with others

• Talk about the types of bullying that can occur:
  • Making fun of something about another person
  • Threatening behavior
  • Physical contact
  • Spreading rumors
  • Belittling or saying bad things about someone else
  • Cyberbullying
• Use a situation on TV or in a book to open the discussion, ask: Have you seen this? Have you experienced this?
• Share an experience you had as a child.
• Ask your children how others might feel if they were teased, hit, made fun of, or pushed.

Examples of questions to ask:

• Does your teacher talk about teasing or bullying?
• Do you know children who are teased at school?
• Are you ever teased because you have been burned?
• Are you ever teased because your sister was burned?
• What kinds of things do children tease you about?
• Do other children pick on you? What do you do when it happens?

• Encourage children to report teasing and bullying to you or another trusted adult.
• Take a child seriously if they say they are afraid or might be hurt if the bully knows they told someone.
• If a child tells you they have been teased or bullied, offer support and comfort no matter how upset you may be.
• Praise your child for being brave and talking about it.
• Reassure your child that together you will figure out a solution.
• Model the behaviors you wish for your child to develop and use, such as respect for all and speaking up when teasing or bullying occurs.

As a Parent:

• Listen to what your child has to say. Avoid interrupting them or offering immediate solutions.
• Keep your emotions in control.
• Remind your child they are not to blame. It is the bully who is behaving badly.
• Find out what your child has already tried to discourage or stop the behavior.
• Seek out the bullying child’s parents and ask for their help in stopping the behavior.
• Report teasing and bullying to the school and ask for help. Discuss how to work together to solve the problem.
  • Start by speaking with the child’s teacher.
  • Also speak to the school principal if the situation is serious or is happening on school grounds or bus.
  • Be specific about incidents. Provide dates, names, and places.
  • Make note of what the school states they will do. Provide feedback to the school on what is working.

What to Teach Your Child:

• Teach your child to firmly and clearly tell the bully to stop, then to walk away and ignore the bully.
• Do not advise children to respond by fighting back.
• Identify additional suggestions or techniques to stop the teasing or bullying.
• Role-play various bullying scenarios with your child that may occur and practice how to respond.
• Tell children to walk away from a potentially threatening situation and tell an adult at once.
• Encourage your child to talk about teasing and bullying with a teacher or school counselor.
• Ask your child to buddy-up in locations where bullying occurs: ask a friend to sit next to them on the bus; arrange to have a friend eat lunch with them; etc.

• Ask if your school has an anti-bullying policy or program in place. Obtain a copy to review.
• Review your state’s Board of Education policies on “safe schools.” For example, to view the State of Michigan's policies, click here.
  • Model Anti-Bullying Policy
  • Policies on Bullying
  • Policies on Safe Schools
• Work with the school to implement and/or maintain an anti-bullying program:
  • Confirm that policy procedures are being followed.
  • Discuss your concerns with other parents.
  • Involve the school board to support your school’s efforts.
  • Seek out and join with other parents to form a stronger coalition to bring about change.
  • Encourage partnerships with other schools that have successful anti-bullying programs.

Young children might find it hard to talk about teasing and bullying. To encourage them to talk:

• Have your child draw pictures of their day. Ask them what has happened at school, in the classroom, on the bus, during lunch, and on the playground.
• Use toys, puppets, or pets to tell a story about a child being bullied or teased.
• Draw faces showing different expressions. As you talk about teasing or upsetting interactions with other children, have your child pick a face that shows how they are feeling. 

• Read a children’s book that deals with teasing or bullying, and discuss the story with your child. Refer to the recommended reading section.

Older children can explain their feelings more easily than younger children. However, they still might need help in talking about teasing or bullying. To encourage them to talk:

• Look for scenes in TV shows or movies to discuss what other things a character could have done when they were teased or bullied.
• Visit the website www.stopbullying.gov with your child and view the “Webisodes.”
• Ask your child to keep a diary of examples of teasing or bullying they see over the course of a week.
• Teach children assertive, not aggressive, responses (i.e. to stand up for your rights while respecting the rights of other people). Have them practice with family members.
• Have children role play various situations, playing the part of the bully as well as the one being bullied. Talk about how it feels.

Teasing and bullying discussions can be a part of your ongoing talks about how things are going at school. To facilitate these discussions:

• Ask how your child feels about other students. Are there things others do or don’t do that are upsetting?
• Look for bullying situations on TV shows, movies, social media or websites to discuss with your child.
  • Why is it bullying?
  • What would you do if it happened to you?
• Monitor your pre-teen/teen’s cell phones and social networking sites for signs of cyberbullying.
  • Discuss how to handle cyberbullying if it occurs.
  • Spend time with your child reviewing information and tips on how to stop cyberbullying at www.StopBullying.gov.
  • Encourage your school to provide and maintain an anti-cyberbullying program.

Encourage young adults to problem-solve and come up with ideas on how to stop teasing and bullying. Ask what, if anything, they want you to do to help address the issue. If they are reluctant to address the problem, encourage involvement by discussing options about how to deal with the issue. If your child is still having problems with teasing and bullying, consider professional counseling.